Preteen Frenemies
by MentalistSweete
Summary: When an unscheduled inator of Doof's goes wrong and an invention of Phineas and Ferb's explodes, Danville is left with one less platypus, scientist and robot... Though it gains three new human preteens. T for language.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own none of these people, except the new identities two of the characters take. Charlene's maiden name is actually from a TicklishOstrich story "Rugrats in Danville."

Countless times, the boys have built machines, collars and potions in order for their pet platypus to talk. Now, Phineas Flynn and Ferb Fletcher are fifteen. Their sister has given up busting them and is away at college. The brothers are single and their parents are divorced. Isabella is their closest friend, since Buford has been at an army academy for the past two years and Baljeet is already in college. Phineas, Ferb and Isabella work hard on an experiment and call for their pet.

Perry is still the top agent in OWCA (Organization Without a Cool Acronym), and still assigned to Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz. They have grown to be more friends than enemies, though from time to time, Doof has dastardly plans. His traps for Perry have gotten better, somewhat harder and more complicated to break free, as he rambles on about his latest project. His German accent continues to ring out with an affectionate 'Curse you, Perry the Platypus' when his plans are foiled and his inator is destroyed. Their frenemeship has been put on hold several times, such as when Vanessa was nearly injured by an explosion and when a missile hit the suburbs.

The teal furry platypus hops on his hang glider, listening to the familiar general-audience-  
friendly cursing. He crash-lands into the tree of his favorite backyard and shakes off the leaves before reverting his eyes unfocused, to either side. The boys have their contraption spread out and Mom should be home any minute. Ferb scoops up Perry before the monotreme can react. He is attached to a helmet and several wired pads. A mechanical cannon is leveled up, causing Perry's indifferent attitude to become focused very suddenly.

This shocks Phineas a bit, overjoyed that it is already working. The cannon picks up speed, airlifting Perry's crashed glider. It collides with the machine as Isabella and Phineas press their respective buttons. A bright flash appears from thin air and Mom walks into the backyard. She drops her bag of groceries as she and the kids watch everything disappear into the sky, in a whirlwind. The kids look back to find Perry, shocked about a naked boy with teal-colored hair, slumped on his stomach.

"Kids, inside. Now."

"No, Mom." Phineas moves closer to the boy. "Our invention worked."

"Too well." Ferb interjects.

"Instead of making him speak human," Phineas starts.

"We turned Perry human." Isabella concludes.

"This is Perry. Our platypus?"

"Yeah, Mom."

"Let's go inside."

The naked boy stirs, feeling woozy. He lets out a soft guttural sound, at once convincing Mom that he is Perry. She instructs Isabella to go find some of Dad's old clothes lying around. She does so while the boys continue to stare at their ex-pet and new brother. Isabella returns shortly and Mom walks over to the boy questionably.

"You can wear these, okay?"

He looks up to her; then to the outfit she had dropped onto his lap. He chirrs in confused approval. He immediately starts getting dressed, causing Mom to usher Isabella and the other boys inside. It takes Perry quite a long time to learn how to get dressed. Mom goes out to uncomfortably help him, and then bestows the role onto Ferb. After getting dressed comes the trouble of standing, walking and running; then talking.

Finally, after seven weeks of being a human, Perry is able to run around the yard and speak with little to no stuttering. He hasn't told his family the truth about where he runs off to, saying instead something like waterfalls (which he did go to Niagara) or zoning off into another dimension (which has definitely happened). The boys had taken it as sincerity. A lot of his strength and fearlessness has evaporated during transformation. The eighth week, Phineas and Ferb haven't been hanging around Perry all the time. It is now he decides to catch up with Monogram.

He climbs into one of his larger entrances and immediately recognizes the difference. He slides unnervingly into his chair. He pulls down the lever and presses the button as he has done so many times before. The white-haired man chokes of his coffee, prompting the redheaded bespectacled intern to pound his back. He is the first to speak.

"Agent P? Is that you?"

He nods in approval, placing his favored fedora atop his head.

"Great Googly Moogly!" Monogram wheezes. "Where have you been the past two months?"

"Home."

"And you can talk now? Great Gatsby. Well, I don't know why you came in today." Monogram gets over the shock easily. "Doof's been on holiday for a while now. Actually, the last day he was active was the day after you destroyed that inator. We didn't monitor any change that day."

\- Back to the Day in Question -

Norm has been feeling queasy lately so, once his dad had finished cleaning his latest exploded mess, Heinz had checked the circuit breaker. The new squirrel mechanisms aren't covering it and Norm's systems are failing. Though he hardly acts like it and never admits to it, Heinz loves "that old junkpile" like a son. He immediately gets started on a new inator, one of not-evil purposes.

The following day around noon, his inator is complete. He thinks nothing of the fact that Perry hasn't come in to bust him. He hadn't even set any traps. He has been working diligently with hardly any sleep. He instructs Norm to stand still at an "x" on the floor, promising him up and down the machine will not hurt him. The machine is to turn him young again, rejuvenate his circuits. The machine hums to life before Heinz is ready, however, and he is caught in the crossfire.

Hours later, he comes to. The DEI is a lot smaller than he remembers. He looks down to see he is wearing a black muscle tee and singed blue jeans. The man scrambles to his feet and searches the area where Norm had been standing. He pushes through the rubble his inator had exploded on its own during the chaos and comes across a groaning boy. The boy is a brunette with green eyes wearing a dark blue hoodie and blue jeans.

"What happened, Dad?" He asks in a prepubescent voice.

Heinz notices first the boy has shiny silver braces. He notices second the boy is his size. Instead of answering, Heinz runs to his bathroom closet, for the full-scale mirror on the back of the door. His reflection stares back, but the reflection is a tall-for-his-age preteen boy with slightly busted blue braces, a shorter rounded nose and a less-triangular face.

"I'm a kid." He speaks in a thinner, fairly lower German accent.

The boy in the hoodie waddles in then; confused by everything that is happening. He looks at himself in the mirror in shock. He then looks over to Heinz then back to his reflection. He seems to be contemplating all the possible situations and comes up with nothing.

"Is that you, Dr. D?"

"Yeah.. Well, you are younger."

The next five weeks, Heinz and Norm drop the Doofenshmirtz name and create new identities. Heinz renames himself Gimmel (from Gimmelshtump) and Norm takes on Robbie (from Robot). They also take Charlene's maiden name, McSell. Gimmel teaches Robbie to be human, while teaching himself how to act like an eleven-year-old in America today.

What did you think? Review, please! -,- 


	2. Chapter 2

When I write about what they are doing while at home, they're talking to themselves or before they've introduced themselves, I'll use "Heinz" and "Norm". When they're talking or around a group of people, I'll use "Gimmel" and "Robbie". Disc. I only own what I owned in the previous chapter.

On the sixth week, Heinz has created solid holographic parents. They can communicate and carry things. They can walk around but cannot leave the porch. Whatever is typed through a specially modified keyboard is what they'll say and/or do. The mother is a brunette with a scarf around her neck. She is wearing a lime green blouse and a long olive green skirt. The father has coal black hair. He is always smoking a cigarette, cigar or pipe. He is wearing a white long-sleeved top and faded olive green overalls. The Doofenshmirtz-in-name house in the suburbs is sold to the holographic couple and their two boys.

The house is three houses down from the Flynn-Fletcher residence. However, they (meaning Gimmel and Robbie) hardly ever go outside. Heinz doesn't care for socializing and, although Norm is now equal in age, the ex-robot continues to obey Heinz and not leave the house unless needed. Many times, Norm irritates Heinz to the point the older sibling sends him outside for various reasons. Sometimes it's to clean out the gutters; others it's to dust the garage. At one point of the seventh week, Robbie is sitting on the curb with a fiver. A teenage girl with raven hair in a pink ponytail walks over to him. She is wearing a hot pink tube top and jean shorts.

"Hi, Whatcha doin'?"

"Hello." He looks up to her with a soft smile. "I'm waiting for the ice cream truck."

"Y'know, the truck only runs Friday afternoons and Saturday mornings. And it is um," She looks over at the watch on the boy's wrist. "Four pm."

"But it's Saturday." He protests.

"Yes, but it's in the afternoon. It already ran today."

"Oh."

He deflates, crumpling the money into his pocket. The teenager sits on the curb next to him with a slight smile toying with her lips. From inside the house, Heinz had been pacing. He happens to glance out the window and notices his 'half-brother' talking with someone. In a mad rush, he starts typing.

"By the way, I'm Isabella." She holds out her hand.

The boy takes it with a smile. "I'm"

"Robbie!" The shrill cry of the boys' 'mother' rings out. "Get in here! Now!"

Norm is aware Heinz must be irked, based on the force of the woman's tone. Isabella had jumped at the voice and Norm had grown very hesitant. Instead of actually bidding her a goodbye, Norm offers Isabella a farsighted apology glance before racing into the house. The woman glares at Isabella and then slams the door shut.

\- Back to Perry's Lair -

Perry sneaks out of his hideout with a salute. He borrows one of Phineas' and Ferb's excess bikes building up in their garage. He had left a note, then starts riding toward town. He bikes past what he had thought as an uninhabited house. The front door slams of said house and a dejected-looking Isabella stands staring at it, from the sidewalk. Perry chirrs to himself, then continues on his journey.

It takes him quite a while this way but manages to arrive at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated in roughly twenty minutes. He had regained some of his strength as a platypus through the weeks of being human. Despite this, there is no way he is about to walk up that huge flight of stairs. He takes the elevator and finds the door unlocked and open. Perry ventures inside, calling out the doctor's name. He also tries for Norm but no one responds. The place is mostly deserted and the rest is trashed.

Perry sighs dejectedly as the only things he manages to find are an unplugged toaster with a picture of him and Heinz resting inside, and a copy of his so-called evil exercise show on DVD format. Perry slumps out of the apartment with what he had found and takes the elevator on the opposite end.

"What floor, are you, taking?" A group of acapella singers ask him as he steps into the lift.

"Uh, the ground floor."

"What's, your, name, kiiiid?"

"Perry."

One of them presses the button, as they all start singing a little theme. "Perry's going to the ground floor!"

Perry raises an eyebrow then asks, "Did you, are you Doofenshmirtz's jingle singers?"

"We used to work for, Doofenshmirtz, to sing his, whole DEI thing, until heee fiiiired uuuuuussss!"

"He fired you? When?"

"We, were fi-red, seven, weeeeeks aaago!"

The bell dings and the door opens. The ex-platypus steps out more bewildered than before. He can hear the jingle singers playing something about needing more friends and a better job. The preteen shakes his head and climbs back on his bike. He tosses his things into a plastic bag that happens to be lying on the ground. He's been human eight weeks. He hasn't seen Doofenshmirtz in the same amount of time and it seems no one has. Also, summer is almost over. School starts next week and Perry will need to attend.

Okay, this was short but another chapter is completed. Let me know what you think!  
-,- -'-( :: )( :: ) 


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